One Night Aftermath - Reconciliation

I spent the night with a man, not my husband. I told my husband before I left that I planned to be home before sunrise and I was, David was waiting for me. I expected him to be in bed and I would join him and wake up next to him as normal. Obviously if you're reading this that was not what happened. David threatened me with divorce if I didn't tell him who the man was. I did tell him, but it took 2 days to get the name from me. I wonder now if I had told him straight away David might not have divorced me. I might have to ask him one day. The man I spent the night with was Claude Wetherby. The problem was we worked for the same company, and it had a strict moral clause contract. I resigned before I got fired. Wetherby attacked my husband and came off worse. Despite me telling my husband Wetherby's name he still divorced me and, actually, hindsight being the exact science that it is, he was right to do so for all the reasons he said. I realised too late how bloody stupid I was to think David would accept what I had done. But now I want my husband back and I will do everything in my power to make that happen. This is how I went about it.

The Story

My parents convinced David to take me back into the house, not as a wife, not as a lover but as a tenant. That was when I found out that my 60 year old plus parents still had a very active sex life.

In between moving out and coming back David and I had worked out the finances. We split the savings and agreed he would keep the house and pay me monthly what he could afford now that he had picked up all the mortgage without my salary. He would have some rent from me whilst my share of the savings lasted or until I could get a job. He should be able to keep up payments with the rent I paid him. It meant he wouldn't be able to pay me much for my share of the house. It did mean the money was going round in circles. I was okay with that.

That fitted in with my plan. It suited me that he didn't sell the house. I wanted him here where I could find him and not moving away. The first morning Dave had some paperwork for me. One was a rental agreement detailing how much I paid, and it stated I had no claim on the house. The utility bills will be split in half when they arrive. I signed it agreeing to without arguing.

The other piece of paper he laid in front of me were some ground rules which I agreed to, although I didn't intend to stick to some of them, there was a bit of wiggle room in there. I would basically pay rent and sleep in our daughter Julie's bedroom. It was much more feminine than our son Jack's. The other rule we had agreed on was the division of labour. We would each cook our own meals, wash the pots we used, do our own washing, he would do the bins, house repairs and the garden, whilst I kept the house tidy, we would wash and get our own cars serviced. He emptied a kitchen cupboard for my food and half the fridge, so we had our own place for our food. He still had his own beer fridge, he allowed me to put my white wine in there.

The rules were simple, if slightly one sided, well, very one sided. There were still over five months to run before the divorce was final. But David decided we were now free agents and did not have to wait for the divorce. I think he wanted to punish me. It worked. I was absolutely certain there was no way he was going to stop the divorce. He warned me more than once that if I had sex with another man, he would divorce me, and David, bless him, keeps his promises when he can. He can definitely keep this one. I have no say in the matter. I am not allowed to bring a man into the house, but he could bring a woman. There were other things, but they didn't matter, anyway I had no intention of bringing a man back into this house, I had no intention of sleeping with any other man except David. If he brought a woman here after what I did to him, I would just have to suck it up. I didn't think he would do that and rub my face in it. He was just too nice a bloke.

We were both getting on a bit, neither of us would see two score year and three again. Neither of us were ugly. In fact, as I had found out, I did scrub up rather well, as did David when he could be bothered. Dave was a good-looking, humorous, intelligent, polite man, he would probably not have too many problems picking up a divorcee or something of that nature if he tried.

But I had a secret weapon over every other woman on this planet. I've known David for over 25 years, we had produced a family together. I knew him, his likes, his dislikes. What turned him off, cheating wives obviously, but what turned him on, and I would play to them, but I would have to be careful. He would recognise any ploy of mine to get back together. Probably the only person I had to worry about was my ex-friend Sophie who promised him a revenge fuck for my cheating, which was ironic because she was the one that suggested I cheat on him. Mind you I don't think Dave, with what he knows now would not put his cock within a yard of her pussy.

It had crossed my mind that perhaps she pushed me that way so she could get a night with my husband as part of her open marriage. That would have broken one of the rules that she and her husband, Tony, had agreed to as part of their open marriage. Not with anybody they know. However, in our discussions in the past she had shown me she had scant regard for those rules.

I spent all my time looking for a new job. I had several interviews. There isn't much call for electronic engineers in our town. Apart from the one I had to leave because I slept with Claude Wetherby against company policy. I had to broaden my search area. I had offers of interviews through various job sites that had received my CV, but they were out of the county, and they would have meant moving away. That did not fit in with my plan to get my husband back. It had to be somewhere I could travel daily.

For the first two weeks I worked hard keeping a distance between me and David. Initially I watched the television in my room, rarely leaving it apart from mealtimes and to do housework which was mainly when David was at work. Most of my time I spent job hunting.

David was working long hours on his latest project. He designed the interior of ambulances with all that electronic equipment. He didn't tell me what his current job was. I think he buried his mind in his work after what I did to him. Also, the overtime money would be useful to pay me for the house. But after two weeks I decided the time was right and I started doing little things by pouring him tea or coffee when I made one for me. Well, that is what house mates do for each other.

One night after about a month Dave was going to be particularly late, he had texted me to tell me. Although I had no right, I had nagged him earlier about not telling me when he was going to be late, I admitted to him I still cared for him, so it was cruel of him not to let me know when he was going to be late in case something had gone wrong or he had an accident. That's what house mates do for each other.

On that evening, I made my dinner, but I made too much. When Dave got in, I could see he was tired. I hoped he had not stopped off at the fish and chip shop on the way home. He hadn't, when he came in, I told him I had cooked too much, and he could have what was left over. It was Stew and Dumplings. I told him there was only one dumpling left. He helped himself. Stew and Dumplings is not one of his favourites, but it was certainly something he liked. I made it just the way he preferred it, big square potatoes, a gentle sprinkling of mixed herbs with thick gravy. No onions.

When he sat down, I went to his fridge and took a bottle of his beer. I got a beer glass and a bottle opener and placed it in front of him. He would have to pour it himself. There were beer cans in his fridge, but it was more effort for me to bring a bottle and the glass and more effort for him to open it and pour it, in some way we were working as a team.

I smiled at him and went to bed.

The following morning, I was up early. When Dave came down, I was sitting at the kitchen table with my laptop. He still looked tired. I was just checking emails. He thanked me for dinner last night. I let him know there was plenty of tea in the pot if he wanted one. He helped himself. After he had sat down, I asked him if he wanted toast or cereal for breakfast. I didn't give him a chance to answer. I went to his cupboard, got his bread and popped it in the toaster. Then I went and got butter and marmalade from his fridge, a knife and a side plate and put it in front of him. He would have to butter his own toast. When the toast popped up, I put it on his plate and left taking my laptop with me.

We settled into that breakfast routine. It was comfortable for the next week. That is what I was aiming for, comfortable. I didn't cook him another meal, that would have been too contrived, and he would see straight through that.

The following week my television broke. I was about to watch one of our favourite programmes that we used to watch together. I told David my telly had packed up, and I suspected a fuse and asked if I could borrow one? He told me I knew where they were and to help myself, I did. It wasn't the fuse, oddly enough. It was never going to be, I'm an electronics engineer. I know how stuff works and how to make it not work. The television programme was about to start, and I asked David if I could watch it with him as my television wasn't working. He agreed, and we sat at each end of the sofa. During one of the adverts, I went to make some tea for both of us. It's what we would have done in the old days, but we would have sat closer together. Whether he noticed my ploy or not, I don't know, he didn't say.

We still never ate together.

I know he went out a few times. Mainly with mates from work. I didn't smell any ladies perfume on him when he got home. The only time I went out was to see my parents and I made sure that my mother let him know where I was. She would phone him to see if I got home alright. I had been asked to go out with some of my ex-workmates, but I declined. I think they wanted to pick my brains on the project they were working on that I'd had to leave. I did invite them around to the house for coffee and on more than one occasion some of my former fellow engineers were there when Dave got home.

There was never any mention of what happened to the man I slept with, Claude Wetherby. It appears he just disappeared off the face of the earth as far as my colleagues were concerned after an initial shouting from the CFO's office. What stuck in people's mind was the comment from the CFO. "And don't expect to get invited for Christmas lunch, now get out!" Claude disappeared after that and was never seen in the office again. I think people put two and two together, came up with four but were too polite to ask.

I had a couple of job interviews; there wasn't much in our local area. It appears I was too experienced, and most people wanted somebody younger and cheaper.

Then I got a job interview for a company that was a supplier of assembled components for Bright Electronics where I used to work. It wasn't much of an interview, more of a chat between engineering colleagues, they asked my opinion on some of their ideas, I gave them answers. What surprised me was they offered me the job there and then.

I had a feeling that something was a tad off. That was sort of confirmed when I left the building with a skip in my step my new boss said. "Oh, by the way Nigel Wetherby sends his regards." Nigel Wetherby, CFO of Bright Electronics and the father of the man I had spent the night with. I wasn't sure how to take that, perhaps it was an apology for his son seducing me. But Wetherby junior could not take all the blame, a large portion of it was mine. I had pushed that event to the back of my mind. It was something i wanted to forget, I didn't know whether to cry or laugh on my way home.

With my parents' help I had managed to keep my car, I was planning to sell it and use the bus to get around, but it didn't come to that. That was part of the reason my father used to get me back into Dave's house. He was on a bus route, they were not.

The job was as a production manager, not what I had done in the past, but the brief was to improve reliability of the circuit boards we produced and reduce the costs if possible. It didn't pay as much as I got at Bright's but there were opportunities.

I decided it was a good thing.

David knew I was going for an interview and when it was due to finish. He sent me a text and asked me how I got on. I decided to keep it close to my chest. I just replied. "It went okay."

After that I sent him a text message. "Are you home?"

He texted back. "No leaving in 10."

"I'm hungry. I don't want to cook. Can I bring something in for us both?"

He replied. "Okay, make it simple."

"Sorry, fancy a Chinese, but I don't have enough money, can you sub me?"

He thought I was running low on cash, well I was, most of the money I had was tied up in savings and I couldn't have instant access to it.

I was on tender hooks waiting for his reply. I know Chinese is his favourite. Then I got it. "Okay, go overdrawn, I'll transfer money when I get in to cover it. But it's only a loan." If I hadn't been sitting outside the Chinese in my car I would have danced a jig. I know exactly what he likes. Whilst I was waiting for the food, I popped across to the small local supermarket and picked up a cheap bottle of red wine.

David was home when I got there, plates were set on the kitchen table. I carried in the bag of food and held up the bottle of wine saying. "I got the job. I start a week Monday. I hope you don't mind. I splashed out a little. It's only a cheap bottle."

What surprised me was the smile that lit up his face. I felt he was genuinely happy for me. That was the first time in about 7 weeks we ate together. That made me happy too. We sat there and I told him all about the interview and my new job and what I knew of it so far.

I sat there looking across the top of my wine glass at the man I loved. Yes, I was being conniving, but I never actually told any lies. This man had not left my heart; I might have left his, after what I did. But he was still firmly embedded in mine, I had to be here with him to make it up to him for the pain I caused, to help him heal.

He sat there eating the food and drinking the rubbish wine. He was the happiest I'd seen him for a while. That was what I wanted, the man sitting opposite me to be happy.

I had to backhand a tear away. I think he noticed, he looked up at me from his dinner and smiled.

When we finished, I cleared away the plates, there were not many. David took the wine and my glass through into the living room, he fetched himself a beer. It was a Friday night he would have more than one. I thought I might approach him tonight but decided that was not a good idea.

David had turned the television on but there's nothing there that interested us. My television was still broken. I told him some more things about my new job, he seemed genuinely pleased for me. Then I said to him, "I think my old CFO, Nigel Wetherby had something to do with it."

I wondered how he would react to the name Wetherby. Nothing, that was good.

It was Saturday evening, David was sitting in the conservatory reading. It looked like a specification or a data sheet. He was making notes on a pad. He had been at work all day. I asked him if I could link to the printer as I had my new contract to print out, to be signed and returned. He said I could, that was good. It was all queued up anyway, I went back to my laptop and pressed print.

After it had printed, I took the papers and walked into the conservatory. He smiled as I walked in. I lifted up the contract and said. "I have you to thank for letting me stay here and for your support. You've been good to me, you never shouted at me, you treated me with respect and like an equal. Your quiet support has meant so much to me. I want to thank you properly."

I laid the papers down, walked across to him and took the sheet and the notepad from his hands and put them on the windowsill. I reached for his belt and started undoing it, it was plainly obvious to him what I wanted. He grabbed hold of my wrists. Looking at me, saying, "No, we cannot do that, we're separated."

"Who's going to know?"

"You could tell the court?"

"Why would I do that? If I do that, it will set the divorce back months and you will throw me out, trust me I will not tell anyone." I tilted my head to one side. "The only risk is old Mr Jones next door putting his head over the fence and sees us and reports us. He puts his head over the fence four or five times a year, so yes, it's risky, but one that we can manage. I don't think his cat will tell on us either." He smiled. By now I had managed to get his zip undone and my hand in his trousers. I could feel his cock getting hard.

And I was wet, that was when I realised how much I wanted this.

I managed to free his cock from his trousers, he lifted his backside so I could pull them further down, and there it was. I couldn't help it. I took it in my mouth all the way. I heard him groan; I looked up at him with his cock in my mouth. He likes it when I do that. But he couldn't see, his head was back, his eyes closed. I pulled my mouth off, moved up and slipped my legs either side of the chair, pulled my knickers aside, straddled and slid onto him. Bloody hell it felt good. I dare not say it out loud, but him inside me was better than Wetherby.

My eyes were closed. I was just enjoying the feeling as I moved slowly up and down. I felt him grab hold of my waist and he slid us off the chair onto the floor.

He started screwing me long and slow, I wrapped my arms and legs around him. I didn't want him to leave, he picked up speed. It was hard and deep.

His head was on my shoulder as he rammed into me, I felt myself coming. I was going to scream, it was so good. I was grunting, he knows what comes after the grunting is generally a scream and I mustn't, someone would hear and work out what was happening. "I'm coming." I said. He eased himself back and clamped his hand over my mouth, partly blocking my nose. That was it, one thrust deep into me and I screamed into his hand. I hung around his neck, my legs round his waist, not wanting to let him go. I felt him shudder as he came. He removed his hand. I took a deep breath.

I heard him mutter quietly. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have blocked your nose."

It was my turn, I rolled until he was on his back with me on top. He was still inside me but starting to wilt. Looking up at me he said. "Go on, say it."

I shook my head, I wanted to, but it wouldn't be right.

"Go on, say it." He repeated, I just shook my head. "Then I'll say it for you, you're sorry, you love me." That is exactly what I was going to say, but he carried on. "And guess what? I'm sorry too, I do still love you, but I can't stay married to you."

That is exactly what I wanted to say. Well not the last bit, but I had resolved myself to the fact we were going to get divorced.

I leaned forward, kissed him on the lips and said. "I know, I'm not asking you to, that's not what this was about. It was about saying 'thank you' and well, we know each other well enough by now, we both have needs."

We got ourselves sorted out, neither of us really knew what to do next, it was a little bit embarrassing. So, I stood up and picked up my contract. Looked at him and spoke quietly, gently. "Thank you." I walked out.

The following day I went down to have breakfast at my usual time, Dave did not turn up. To save embarrassment I went to see my parents and told them the news about my job. Strangely enough I did not tell them what I did to thank David.

I did not see Dave until Sunday evening. I think he stayed out the way, he may have even gone to work.

He was sitting on the sofa watching the television, it was a Johnny English film. He likes those, they're funny. I went and sat on the far end of the sofa and tucked my legs underneath me. I turned towards him. I was tempted to use the word 'sweetheart' but decided not to, instead I said. "David, can we have a chat about yesterday evening please?"

"I suppose we'd better, I'm sorry I shouldn't have taken advantage of you. I didn't mean to block your nose either, sorry about that."

I was a bit confused, he didn't take advantage of me, I took it of him. He was always the gentleman.

"No, it was me, I was so happy, and you've helped me by letting me stay here, yours has been a quiet, solid, sturdy support, one that I didn't deserve."

He hesitated, there was a nervousness about him I hadn't seen before, and I had no idea what it was about. Then he hit me with it, something I never suspected.

"Was it better than..."

Oh, shit male egos. But that was easy to answer. I pushed myself across the sofa, I grabbed hold of his hand, pulled it to my lips and kissed it. I had words running around my head most of them since Saturday. "Oh yes, so much better." I kissed the back of his hand again. "I know it was rushed, I know it was hurried. But having somebody inside me that loves me, not just using me as a receptacle for their pleasure. You have nothing to be ashamed of, absolutely flipping nothing." And it was true, there were no lies, fibs or half-truths in there. I felt I had something I could build on. I kissed the back of his hand again, looked him in the face and said, bearing my soul. "I would like to do it again, could we be housemates with benefits? No strings attached, you could still have your girlfriends, whatever you want."

I saw several things flashing through his mind. He was trying to work out if he was a better lover because it had been several weeks, was he better lover because we loved each other or he was better at making love? That Saturday in the Conservatory didn't count, that was not making love. It was loving, but it wasn't the gentle passionate act that we knew as making love.

"I don't know, I really don't know."

I leaned in and kissed him. "Well, I do, I will be here anytime you want me." With that I stood up and walked away. I had several ideas running around in my head, one thing was his apology for putting his hand over my nose. I thought back to that nose blocking thing, the lack of breath, that was a bit risky. Shit, I'm going to have to investigate that further, it was a bit of a turn on. I would have to talk to Summer about it. She was my psychotherapist.

Meanwhile over the next few weeks I slowly built up the gentle touching in passing. I did not dress sexy, just the gentle touch and a smile.

Summer was a nice lady, she had long auburn, somewhat unruly hair and she dressed like I expected, all flowing autumn-coloured dresses. She was quiet, gentle and softly spoken but she could be quite blunt at times, as an engineer I respected that. No pussyfooting around, no trying to make excuses for me, trying to make me feel better about what I had done. If she thought I had done something stupid or dangerous, she told me.

I had talked to Summer about what I considered my risk addiction. Strangely enough she agreed with me, I was addicted to risk. I had explained to her absolutely everything, the lay-by all those years ago, the Steam train event and so many others in the last 20 odd years and the buzz I got from the risk of being caught doing something kinky.

People would be slightly miffed at seeing people having outdoor sex as long as there were no children about, but outdoor sex with someone tied to a tree would bring on a whole different reaction.

I had told her about Sophie and her open marriage. She suggested that possibly, Sophie only needed a release every two or three months, I was similar and had built up a rhythm and I needed the rush of the risk every three or four months and with Derek and Jasmine's next adventure so far away my mind accepted the risk to my job was acceptable as we would never going to get caught by work.

She suggested my love for David would not let me risk my marriage. So that was why I told him. She said that I rationalised if I told David, it wasn't cheating.

Summer pointed out it was still cheating in everybody else's eyes but mine and it was a bloody stupid idea right from the start. I had to agree with her in hindsight.

I told her Sophie had convinced me Dave's love for me would allow him to forgive me, eventually, but it would be hard work. I even told her Sophie had offered herself for revenge sex.

Summer suggested that Sophie may have had an ulterior motive. That had crossed my mind too. Summer carried on saying. "Are you often misled or controlled by other people?"

"No." I wondered where this was going.

"But are you talking about work, where you are in control, or your personal life where you share everything with David?"

"I don't think so."

"But you let Sophie take control, suggest something you knew was wrong and let her dictate to you her ideas."

I thought about it a bit. "Yes, I suppose I did."

"Well, that was a bloody stupid thing to do, wasn't it, giving someone you knew to be a liar control over your thoughts."

I burst into tears.

When I had calmed down, I told her I couldn't go behind Dave's back, if I did and he found out that would be instant divorce. I didn't even consider that he would divorce me if I told him. Sophie backed up my thoughts. I knew I would go through a rough patch, but I was convinced eventually he would forgive me, and I could make it up to him. And I didn't want Sophie anywhere near my Dave.

It appears I didn't know him as well as I thought I did.

Summer took a different tack and said a little forcibly. "Do you think you used all this just to have sex with Wetherby because he is young, fit and you were attracted to him?"

I looked at her aghast. "No absolutely not, that never crossed my mind."

Then she said something quietly that rattled me to my soul. "How do you think David saw it, do you think it crossed David's mind?"

That unfortunately, is exactly how David would have seen it. Summer went on to explain, even having never met David some of the things that would have gone through his mind whilst he sat there waiting for me, and they may still be going round in his mind now. Summer started listing things David may have thought. Why, was he not good enough, what had he done wrong? She went on for ages listing what his thoughts might be. I never intended Dave to feel any of those feelings.

She carried on, characteristically she said after laying out what thoughts would be going through David's mind that night. "Don't you think the whole thing was a rather bloody stupid thing to do?"

I had to agree with her on that point.

That was the meeting after David and I had sex in the conservatory, it wasn't making love just yet, that is what I was aiming for. I did tell her about the conservatory sex, and the risk of old Mr Jones next door of course. I also told her about the feeling from David's hand over my mouth.

After my initial meeting with Summer, I thought what she said was a load of baloney, however after that visit and over the next couple of nights lying on my own in Julie's bed, thinking, I realised she had something.

She told me that now I realised I had a risk addiction, I should be able to control it better. It's like when you notice in the office how much noise someone makes sitting at their desk and then you realise you're actually quite noisy yourself, or when you're driving and you see someone do something dangerous or stupid then you realise, you had done exactly the same thing too.

Now I can recognise the need, I can control it better.

I will have to admit to David that I was a risk addict. So, using the information I knew about myself and how to combat it. If I felt the need in the future, I would have to talk to Dave about it. He also liked risk, did it affect him in the same way? I assume one day we'll find out.

If I get back with David, I will just need to talk to him and tell him what I want. He's quite imaginative. I'm sure he could do something at short notice. If I get him back, I can't afford to lose him again, I don't want to take that risk, that is a risk too far and not the sort of risk I like.

The rest of the week carried on as if nothing had happened in the conservatory on Saturday evening, I could see he had been thinking but then again so had I.

Now was time to start using the knowledge I had of him. I still hadn't replaced my television. We were sitting watching a film on Saturday evening again both sitting at either end of the sofa. The credits were running. The film was one of the TNG Star Treks. We like both Star Trek and Star Wars. They tell different stories, but we prefer Star Trek. "David." I said quietly. "David and Mary are not allowed to have sex. But what about Derek and Jasmine?"

He looked at me, his mouth slightly open, his eyes wide. I carried on. "And everything that that entails, that is until you find yourself a new girlfriend to replace me." It was not an honourable thing to do, I know. I was pretty certain he wouldn't find a woman that did all the things that Mary and David did, let alone what Derek and Jasmine got up to. Yes, it was a ploy to get him back, but it wasn't the sex I wanted, well okay it was. But that was not the ultimate aim. The ultimate aim was to become his wife again, that may not be possible, but I had to try. I carried on. "Please just think about it."

The next film had started. I just stood up and went to his fridge and fetched him a beer, opened it, poured it into the glass and took it to him. I got myself a glass of wine and sat on the sofa, still at the far end. When I glanced across to him, I didn't think he was looking at the film, well we had seen it before anyway, it was 'Top Gun'.

Learning the business of the new job and a 30 mile drive with traffic I didn't always know when I was getting in. I did text David when I left the office, like I asked him to text me when he was going to be late. It's what housemates do, so you don't worry one another.

I quickly learned that if I left work 5 minutes later than the planned finish time, the traffic was horrendous. If I left 20 minutes later, the traffic was much better, of course it didn't always work. A couple of times in those first two weeks I got home to find out David cooked his own dinner and left me something.

Because of the drive I was leaving for work before Dave. So, I started making him a pot of coffee and a pot of tea for me. I knew he preferred coffee in the morning, He will drink tea and for me to switch to coffee would seem too coincidental, anyway I didn't like it in the morning, the afternoon was fine.

A quick breakfast together became a regular thing, he would have cereal or brown bread toast, butter and blackcurrant jam or marmalade and I had brown bread toast and honey.

It had been over two weeks since the Conservatory incident and I decided it was time to try pushing a few more buttons. I wasn't sure how to do it, then it came to me. It was Saturday night and Dave had been at work all day. It has been a rough week for both of us. He went out for a few beers to the rugby club with his mates, most of his work mates were also rugby club members, a few of them played as well, it was the cheap beer. I didn't think he would be long, he looked pretty tired. I tracked his phone, I saw him heading home, he was earlier than I expected. I went and put on my short blonde Jasmine wig and 5-inch peep toe heels with bright red toenails peeking out the front.

I was standing at the bottom of the stairs naked. Then I realised as I heard the key go in the door lock that he might be bringing mates home. I rushed upstairs. Fortunately, he was alone. I heard the keys drop on the hallway table and I walked down the stairs, naked except for the wig and heels. "Derek, you and Jasmine have had a rough week, I think we can both do with some release."

He looked at me, and I wasn't sure if I overstepped the mark. "Your bed or mine, I don't mind." I said.

He looked old, tired, and haggard. I wasn't sure how much of that I had done to him.

Possibly because of me, he was burying himself in work trying to forget what I had done. My parents convinced him to let me come back here, and he might have been staying at work to keep a distance between us. I knew they had a big new contract with specific requirements. I gather these ambulances were for the military. He told me that much. Apart from that he never talked much about work. In fact, David and Mary talked very little since I got back, even over breakfast, unlike before. To be honest, there was not much opportunity with the hours we were working, especially David.

This was make or break, so I held my hand out to him, I cocked my head slightly to one side and smiled. He walked forward and I took his hand and led him upstairs. I took the opportunity to go into my old bedroom, now his alone. I turned him to face me. I took off his tie, shirt, unbuckled his belt, and the trousers fell to the floor. I knelt down, tapping one leg and he lifted it and I took off his shoe, sock underpants and that trouser leg off. I repeated it from the other side. His cock was right in front of my face, but it wasn't getting hard. I opened my mouth, and I took it inside. It started to get hard but not like I expected. I looked up at him.

He looked even more haggard from down here. This was not going to work. I stood up, kicked my heels off and eased him gently back towards the bed. I pulled back the covers, gently laid him down, then I climbed in beside him, took his head and rested on my shoulder. I think the poor man was asleep within a minute.

Actually, showing him support and love was probably better than giving him sex. I cried gently as I laid there cuddling my nearly ex-husband. The wig was getting itchy. I had to take it off, but I did not put it too far away, he would have to wake up with Jasmine, not his cheating soon to be ex-wife. I felt him stir about three, his usual time for a loo visit. I buried my head under the covers, by the time he finished relieving himself Jasmine was back in play. When he got back into bed, I asked him if he was okay? He smiled that wonderful smile and gently nodded his head. He spooned me, which made it difficult to remove the wig, it was worth putting up with.

The sun rose in the morning, it was still early, and I felt something else rising. Now was Jasmine's time. I took him in my mouth, he was half hard already. I got him fully hard. He was laid on his back, I straddled him and inserted him inside me. I just sat there, it felt so good. I rocked gently back and forwards, nothing too vigorous. He let me carry on, I changed the rocking to up and down. What I wanted was him to be on top, him to be the dominant and after what my psychotherapist said I took her advice and whispered in his ear. "Now Derek is awake would he be so kind as to roll Jasmine onto her back and give us what we both need." I kissed him, he kissed me back. I felt his arms wrap around me and we rolled together and then he loved me. It wasn't hard hammering sex. He moved the way I liked him to move, but the cheeky bugger stopped just as I was about to come. Normally morning fun was gratifying, it's the evening ones where we teased and toyed with each other, but not this morning. Was he trying to prove something? I don't know, I don't care. I had one orgasm, and he still hadn't come the second time we came together I hung onto him and cried. Then I fell asleep in his arms.

I felt Dave get out of bed and I saw him start to dress in his work clothes. I was hoping he would stay in bed with me. Looking down he told me things had not gone well yesterday. He had to go in to finish preparing for a trial installation.

I knew his work did practice fitting of racks in ambulances before the medical equipment turned up.

As soon as he left the room, Jasmine took the wig off and became Mary again. I dressed and rushed downstairs. I offered to make him breakfast and coffee. David declined, politely, quietly. I thought he was embarrassed and wanted to get out of there.

Around midday I sent Dave a text. 'You're very busy, can I make dinner for us both? Something simple?'

I got a thumbs up emoji.

Bugger, now what to cook? Not a roast nor liver and bacon, his favourite.

Pie! Steak pie, potatoes, vegetables and gravy. I will have to pop to the supermarket for a pie and probably make sure he has enough beer.

I got a message, Dave said he would be home at about 7.

We were eating and I asked. "How is it going, bit rough?"

"Yup."

"Want to talk about it?" I said quietly. We had finished eating by now.

"I think I've got it but tomorrow will tell when we do the trial installation on the Chinook."

What! A Chinook was a RAF military heavy lift helicopter used for Casualty Evacuation amongst other things.

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Dave carried on. "I'm worried about electronic interference. All that medical equipment uses Wi-Fi and Bluetooth to communicate, and we are not sure how it will affect the aircraft systems. They have asked us to put the equipment under where the electronic engine controls are. I think we have got it covered, but it's still a worry. Next week is not just a trial installation; it's a systems interaction test as well."

All alternating current electronic equipment radiates Radio Frequency energy, which can affect nearby electronic equipment. Like overhearing someone's conversation and being affected by what you hear. It is called Electromagnetic Interference. I was not an expert, but I had a fair bit of experience from my work at Bright's Electronics.

Dave designed interiors of Ambulances and even Air Ambulances, but Military Cas Evac helicopters are a completely different kettle of fish. The equipment needed on an Air Ambulance for domestic use is completely different from the equipment needed in a battle zone. The helicopter is completely different as well. It has all sorts of Military equipment like radar and missile warning, self-defence and Electronic Flight and Engine Control Systems, we had similar equipment in tanks with similar problems.

"I know a bit about this. Do you want to tell me what your worries are?"

He just nodded and went to fetch his computer; I cleared away the plates. He showed me the drawings of what he'd done to reduce interference. We talked about bonding, resistance values, shielding, power levels, frequencies, distances from the medical equipment from the aircraft electronic equipment. I wasn't an expert, but he seemed to have done all the right things.

We talked long into the evening. I even got a pencil and paper and drew him some explanatory diagrams. I did some calculations. It all seemed good, but he was still nervous.

I made a few suggestions of how to improve things if they found anything in the interaction testing.

He told me he'd probably be late most of the week, they were going to do systems testing after the initial fit. Basically, you turned everything on in the aeroplane then you turned all the medical equipment 'on' then moved it around to where it might be in the aircraft cabin to see if anything happened to the helicopter. It was a recognised test method we used on tanks all the time, but tanks don't fly. He assured me he would not be flying in the helicopter.

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I sat next to him as we talked. It was nice, very nice.

We even shared a couple bottles of beer as we talked. It was nearly eleven when we finished. Dave thanked me with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. I went to bed and cried my eyes out. Sitting with him talking, discussing problems reminded me of the project that got me in this trouble. Talking on the way home and over the weekend of the anti-drone project I ended up running at Brights Electronics, I missed that interaction, that comfort, that discussion that working with Dave brought.

Dave had to leave early the following morning to drive to the RAF base at about the same time I would normally leave. I got up to have breakfast with him. I wanted to be there when he left and show him support. Dave was much happier at breakfast. For the first time since I got back, I watched Dave drive off the driveway like we used to do every day for each other. I waved till he drove out the end of our road.

I went back indoors with tears in my eyes at what I'd lost due to my stupidity. I realised that was selfish, I should be thinking about Dave, not about myself. As I walked back to the house, I resolved to pull myself out of the doldrums and focus on the future. I had a job, and I was living in the same house as David but not forgetting the mistakes of my past. One of my mistakes was cheating on him in the first place. If I got him back, I would never do that again.

I got a message from David around 2:00 telling me he was going to be late. I replied asking if I could get something to eat for him and how is it going? The reply was short, 'yes please. so so'. He did not tell me what time he would be in.

I decided to make something that could stay warm in a pot, chilli, stovies or a stew something like that. I stopped on my way home in the supermarket and picked up the ingredients to make a few pot meals. David got in just after 8. He looked weary again, I'd had mine but there was a place set for him and something keeping warm on the stove. We talked a little about how things have gone. He went to bed early. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday were pretty much a repeat of Monday apart from Thursday, he asked me to eat with him, we talked, he had got progressively happier throughout the week. I guessed things were going well.

David was home when I got there on Friday and something smelled nice. The table was set, it wasn't our best China, but there was a wine bottle waiting for me. "What's this all about.?" I queried.

"It's all done, it was a great success, just the report writing to do, but some of the tips you gave me helped, so this is just a little thank you." He put a bit of a stoney look on his face and said. "This is David and Mary, not Jasmine and Derek."

I smiled at him and said. "Thank you, kind Sir, however, can Derek and Jasmine play later."

"I'm not sure of the wiseness of doing that. I'd like to, but I think it's risky." Then he realised what he'd said and gave me a small smile. "But I suppose you'd like the risk anyway?" He was correct.

"Yes, but only if you're entirely comfortable with the risks we take, it has got to be a two-way thing."

"Well, I'm not sure, let's see how dinner goes first."

My plan was working, I had no real time line except to get back into his heart before someone else did, but with the hours he was working there would be very little time for socialising, unless it was with me and I had Jasmine as a not so secret weapon. The date that did matter was the divorce date, and I had plans for the weekend following that day. There were two prongs to my attack, one was Jasmine and sexual, the other was him to be comfortable around Mary again. That was probably going to be the hardest bit apart from trust, that would be a steep hill to climb, it could take years, but I was desperate to do it.

As Mary sat down to dinner, Jasmine started to plan, it didn't take much, okay a little bit. Jasmine walking down the stairs in her blonde wig, a tight corset and stockings seemed to work.

We lay together, Jasmine was resting on his shoulder. A lock of blonde hair fell across my face, I lifted it out of the way, he saw me do it and whilst he was looking at me I said. "Can Jasmine ask a favour?"

He nodded.

"When you accidentally put your hand over my nose in the conservatory, I found it a turn on, would you mind doing that again, not choking me just restricting my breathing."

He looked a little confused. I carried on. "You know I tell my physiotherapist everything? Well, I mentioned that and she said it was up there with my risk addiction, especially if I was restrained, that would heighten it even more. But she warned me to only do it with somebody I trusted. And despite what I've done to you, I trust nobody in this world as much as you. Could Jasmine ask you to do that again please?"

He just gave me a smile and said. "You're expecting Jasmine and Derek to play again, are you?"

"Yes, anytime you're ready." I left it at that for now. We fell asleep.

I had been at my new workplace for a couple of weeks when the company induction course came up. I told David the induction was three days with two overnight stops to look at other factories, and I would let him know when I was coming home. I pointed out the other factories were up North. I didn't tell him any lies, just a little frugal with the truth. If he had asked for the timings and when I planned to be home, I would have told him.

The course started Wednesday, I went to see my Mum and Dad on Tuesday evening, I had to ask Mum a favour. The last time I saw Dave was fleetingly Tuesday morning. I had made dinner Monday evening, and we sat comfortably watching telly, mine was still broken. I could have pushed the edge connector back on the circuit board and fixed it.

I wanted him to miss me, the being there, the meals, being comfortable, just like we had been before I cocked up.

I knew he was going out Friday evening for a drink with his mates. It had been a fairly regular thing for a few years, but more so since, well you know when. He was due to go out at about 6, I got home from the course just before that, I wanted to get back before he went out, I managed it. As he left, I said. "I missed you." Then I kissed him on his cheek. It was no lie, I had.

When he went out for a beer with his mates that was good, they could talk work, rugby, golf and shit. It would be like getting back to normal. I tracked his phone, when he was on his way home I got a beer from the fridge and it was waiting for him when he got in. He probably didn't need any more. He looked at the beer then me and said. "Are you trying to get me drunk to get me back into bed?"

I put on a slightly serious tone. "Yes, I do want to get you back into bed, I want to show you how much I love you, but not while you're drunk, that would be cheating." He came across and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you." He plopped in front of the telly and turned it on. There was not a lot on. He asked how the induction went. It was all very interesting I told him

Looking at me, he said. "I see you have a wedding ring on, has something happened that I don't know about? Was your induction course that much fun?"

"It had its moments."

I could no longer wear my wedding or engagement rings after he pointed out to me that the rings he had given me with love had been tainted when I wore them and they came into contact with another man's cock. They were precious to me, David gave them to me, I still had them, but I could never wear them again.

I explained to David that I didn't want to go to the course without rings on, I was still married, and I didn't want to get hit on. I paused, giving him time to say something, but he didn't. I told him I went to my Mum and asked to borrow some rings, Dad loaned me his wedding ring as he couldn't wear it any longer. My Mother gave me a stark warning. "If that ring touches any other man apart from David, you will not be welcome in this house ever." It was a warning I did not need.

"Did you get hit on. on your nights away?" He asked.

I told David what happened. "At the induction we all had to give a personal potted history. I told them where I came from, what I'd done previously, I wanted to expand outside my current range of skills, and I was married. I didn't mention it was pending a divorce.

"Yes, I did get hit on once. Most men treated me as an equal but one I had to tell 'go away I'm married and I don't cheat." I looked down. "You don't know how guilty I felt when I said that."

Some of the men warned him off. He was an arrogant little shit, full of himself. I noticed he had a white band around his ring finger.

"After the warning I watched him, he became more discreet, he started chasing another woman, she was wearing a wedding ring. The following morning, I found her at breakfast. Without introducing myself I sat down next to her and said. 'That's very risky' she looked at me with a frown. 'Sleeping with a man in the same company as you. Okay he might work in a different division, but it will get back to your husband. What will you do then?"

"She replied to me with a smile. 'Yes, it's risky that's part of the fun'."

"I told her to learn from other people's mistakes, it's better than learning from your own, especially when it's too late and the damage is done."

"She looked at me and said, 'You've done this?'."

"I didn't answer, just looked her straight in the face."

"'Oh shit', she said. "Did it hurt?

"'More than you would ever believe possible and not just me.' I didn't let up, I carried on to make her aware of some of the problems she would face if she carried on.

"I said to her. 'There are a few ways this is going to end. You said you were married with 2 children. When your husband finds out he will divorce you and leave you looking after 2 children, your husband will find out because that arrogant twat will brag about shagging you.' She looked stunned at that. 'Or'. I carried on. 'You will feel guilty and tell your husband it was a one-night drunken mistake. I don't know your husband, you do, how will he take that? If you don't use protection, you might get pregnant or an STD. Is it worth it? Your body, your life, well your husbands and children's lives too. Another scenario you will try to bury it, but when the guilt hits you will bonk your husband to death, let him have your arsehole, dress up for him. If you do all that he will instantly think you've been cheating on him and he will look round and he will find out. Is all that pain worth it for one night of fun? He's probably not very good anyway, he's too selfish, too arrogant."

"She told me she got caught up in the events of last night, being chased, complimented, he was very attentive, it felt good. For a while she wasn't a mother, a wife and an employee with all the responsibility that those jobs had. I think it hit her what she was going to do and what she would lose. She hadn't thought about the outcome, just the fun.

"Lover boy came and sat next to her, he discreetly stretched his hand out to her leg. She pushed him away. Looking at him and telling him to never talk to her again, she stood up and walked away leaving her breakfast half eaten.

"The rumour was that he later hit on one of the single girls in a relationship and she reported him for sexual harassment, he got an official warning."

I felt a tear as it trickled down my face, it had been a difficult tale to tell, reminding me of my own failures.

Dave came across and sat next to me and wiped it away. "I think you're very brave to do that, to open up to a stranger. Do you know who she is, can you keep in contact with her?"

I nodded. "I will keep an eye on her. She hasn't made the same mistake as me, but she did it for the same reason. Mine was much, much worse, and I'm... I can't keep saying it but you know what I mean."

He squeezed my hand, He leaned back and said. "Tell me some more about what you learned." He was changing the subject, that was a relief. I told him about what the company produced, he knew but I went into more detail. I explain that some of the electronics we made in hundreds. You don't make thousands of Main Battle Tanks. However. Other parts of the company made electronics for cars. But they only wanted them just in time, so that was batches of about 1000. And it was in these ones they were having the problems with reliability.

Saturday, I went to see my parents and returned Dad's ring. I told them about what had happened about the course and what David and I talked about when I got home. My Dad walked me out to my car. "You've got a plan, haven't you?" I gave him a small smile and nodded.

"He will never marry you; you know that."

Again, I nodded. "I would be happy to be Ms Burrows living with Mr Mitchell under the same roof as husband and wife."

"Is that your aim?"

"That will be plenty good enough Dad." I replied.

Dad kissed me on the cheek and said. "Good luck, do not hurt him again, it would not be good for him."

"I won't Dad, I promise."

That evening watching telly I made my next approach. We were sitting on the sofa, I said to David. "Do you remember how we got into this tying up thing?"

"Yeah, I do. Watching Hart to Hart, wasn't it?"

"Yup, that was it, Stephenie Powers playing Jennifer Hart. She was tied up with her hands in front, and I said that was silly she could easily get free. You said it would be harder than it looked. I went and fetched a tie of yours and told you to prove it."

"You used my Rugby Club tie."

"Sorry, I thought it was your old school tie, they have the same colour stripes. But you cheated, you tied my hands in front, but you put the knot underneath and I couldn't get my teeth to it. I went into the kitchen and picked up a kitchen knife to cut myself free. You grabbed the knife from me so I couldn't cut your tie off."

David laughed. "What did you expect, those ties are bloody expensive."

"I didn't expect what you did next."

"Well, I had to teach you a lesson." He grinned.

"Not like that, you tied my hands behind my back. I was definitely not going to get free then, even with a knife. But what you did after that was really not fair."

I saw David smile. "I didn't hear you complain."

"It felt like a kind of release; I couldn't stop you undoing the buttons of my blouse and you did it so slowly, so teasingly. You know how I like having my boobs played with. I couldn't shout at you with the kids' asleep upstairs."

"When you pulled my knickers down, opened my legs and started kissing me there, a very small part of me was always worried about how I smelt and tasted for you down there. But that night I had no control, I was in heaven."

"You could have just said stop."

I smiled back at him. "But you see, I didn't want you to stop. I knew you wouldn't cross any boundaries, you could have done anything to me, you know even, that." I paused a little bit. "Do you know that for the first time I felt fully released? I knew it was going to end but for that short period of time I was your plaything, I wasn't a mother or wife, an employee, a daughter and I had no worries because I knew you were there with me and you would treat me right. You would never hurt me, all I had to do with lay back without any guilt and enjoy what you did to me. You would never do 'that' without me saying yes. I know that sounds strange now, but that's how it was that first time."

In a serious voice David replied. "But you don't like 'that' why would I do that to you." He gave a little laugh. "Anyway, it wasn't my birthday."

I looked down a bit sheepish. "That was so good the first time. Not saying the others weren't, but the first time opened the door to a whole lot of new things we had never even thought to do before. Bloody hell our sex life was never boring was it?" I saw a tent in his trousers, this might work.

He reached across. "Our life was never boring, busy, but never boring..." Unspoken, the word. "Until..." hung in the air.

This wasn't the way I wanted the conversation to go. I wanted to look to the future, but I suppose we had to recognise the past. "My sweet man, I knew I could always trust you in anything we did, not just bedroom play."

I finished the 'Until...' the unfinished sentence, because now It was hanging there, someone had to finish it, or the unspoken words would hang around for ages.

"Until I got things wrong, and it's all my fault not yours, I expected you to trust my love for you. My biggest mistake was agreeing with Wetherby and Sophie, my second biggest mistake was not seeing it from your point of view, or maybe that was my first mistake because if I'd looked at it from your side, I wouldn't have done it. Sorry, I'm sorry to keep going on about it. But what I did hurt you deeper than I could ever have expected and I can't explain suitably enough, but I can try to make it up to you, if you will let me."

That wasn't the way I wanted the conversation to go. I wanted it to end up in his bed re-creating that first night. It all went to rat shit.

David stood up, he stroked my hair and said quietly. "It's been a long few days, I'm going to bed." I was hoping after my confession he would invite me, Mary, to join him. But instead, he said. "I'll see you in the morning." He walked away upstairs. I waited until he had gone into his bedroom before I burst into tears. I had screwed it up again.

I had not given up. At breakfast the following day as I was sitting holding my mug of tea, I looked at David sitting across the kitchen table from me. "David, If Mary can't make it up to you, but can Jasmine? I know you miss the tying up stuff. Your trousers gave you away last night when we talked about it and we haven't done that since before, well you know when. Also, I know it is one of your favourites."

"What do you suggest?"

I smiled, an opening. "Give me till 12 o'clock and I will get back to you with something we will both like." I already had a plan, but I wanted to give him some time to ponder.

He had finished some work in the garage, I met him and said. "Please stay in your room from 7 until 8 and then come to the conservatory. Do not turn any lights on." Whilst he was working in the garage I retrieved some of our old toys from his bedroom. I hoped he didn't notice, it would spoil the surprise.

This time of the year it got dark at 6 and there was a half moon, it was forecast to be medium overcast cloud and light rain. There was very little ambient light, just enough to see by.

David walked in the conservatory exactly on time to find Jasmine wearing her purple satin corset tightened to give an hourglass figure, stockings, thigh length leather boots, leather chocker, over the elbow leather opera gloves. Her hair and make up was the naughty way Dave liked it. Her hands handcuffed to the conservatory cross beam over her head. Around her neck hung her favourite ball gag and a leather blindfold. On David's chair there was a selection of vibrators. The handcuff key was on a chain was around Jasmine's neck.

David was stunned, his mouth hung open. It had been months since we played like this, and I missed it. Both Mary and Jasmine had dressed exactly like this before, but never anywhere like this where they could be seen by other people.

"Well?" I asked quietly, I wasn't sure how much he could see. I could see him clearly and I hoped he could see me clearly.

"Stunning. Are you sure you want to carry on?"

"Absolutely."

"Safety word is our usual or hum the national anthem, okay?"

"Yes."

He stepped forward, grabbed my hair and dragged my lips to his, soft gentle with his tongue probing my mouth. I opened it and let him. His other hand slid down and eased my breasts from the confines of the corset cups, my nipples were rock hard. He rolled them gently between his fingers. I loved it when he did that. I could smell my arousal.

His hand left my breast and travelled to my pussy. It was bald, he likes that too. His fingers brushed my clit, I shuddered, my legs almost gave way. Dave gently pushed his fingers inside, I thrust my hips forward to get him deeper, he just moved his hands with my thrusts. "Deeper." I said through his lips.

"Not yet."

He sank to his knees, I hadn't realised he was now naked. I had no idea how he did that.

He took hold of my knees and eased my legs apart, I heard the creak of leather. I felt his warm breath on my pussy, then his tongue brushed up my slit over my clit. I wanted more, I groaned as I pushed my hips forward.

"Oops, I forgot." I heard David say through the mist in my mind. My eyes were closed.

I felt him stand up in front of me. I opened my eyes and saw him bring the ball gag up. I opened my mouth obediently. It nestled snugly behind my teeth. I enjoyed the pleasure as he buckled it tightly behind my head.

The blindfold was next. I love the smell of leather.

He got back down and carried on his administrations. I felt him slip a finger into my pussy then two, I leapt as his tongue attacked everywhere down there, clitoris then into my pussy and then I felt his finger up my backside, just the one. I almost came. Every time I got close the bastard stopped, he loved to tease me. Twice he let me get close, I knew when it came it would be earth shattering. Then I felt him pull away, he stood up, kissed my nose and spun me round so I was facing outwards. He slipped the blindfold off, I could just see our reflection in the glass. It was as sexy as hell. He grabbed my waist and pulled me backwards. I knew what was coming next, we had done this before. He slipped his cock in me, as he thrust, I pushed back. I loved it, he went in so deep. He slid one hand over my bald pussy and started playing with my clit, the other hand fondled my breast. I absolutely loved it.

All of a sudden the back garden and the conservatory were ablaze with light. I heard Dave whisper, "Jess." That was next doors bloody cat. Shit I forgot she used our garden as a short cut about this time most nights. There I was cuffed to the roof wearing a corset, thigh boots, gagged being fucked and anybody who looked could see us. I thrust back into David again. He whispered in my ear. "Don't worry people will see Jasmine not Mary, most people know we are divorcing. They will think I have picked up a kinky floozy."

But he didn't pick up speed. He gently screwed me. It would take 2 or 3 minutes for the light to go out. The risk of discovery, the feeling, even though people wouldn't think it was me, was immense. As the lights went out, I saw David's hand move towards my face, my eyes had not got accustomed to the dark when I felt his thumb and finger close off my nose. I could breathe around the ball gag, just.

David started thrusting harder, I was pushing back, my eyes were closed I could feel myself coming. I was taking a breath when I felt David's hand close down over the ball gag and stopped my breathing completely. I screamed with what air I had left as I came. My ears drummed, I saw flashing lights.

The next thing I remembered was waking up on our sofa, David beside me, it was still dark. I was no longer wearing my boots and my wig had gone.

I was still wearing my corset and my gloves, I soon found out that my hands were cuffed behind my back and the rug that normally lay over the back of the sofa was over us.

I had a need, an urgent need.

I gently bit David's ear and he woke up, startled. "What's up?"

"I need the little girls room and it's a bit difficult like this." I rattled the handcuffs. "Why am I cuffed anyway?"

"Because I'm knacked and I don't trust you not to start something."

I smiled. "I still have my mouth"

"And I still have the ball gag." He said.

"If you want to do this, can I have rope not the cuffs, they're uncomfortable."

He undid the cuffs and I ran to the toilet.

He fetched ropes from the conservatory, I took off the gloves and corset, it had been very tight. When he got back, I turned away from him, placed my hands behind my back and crossed my wrists, it took David seconds to secure them, they felt comfortable, I felt comfortable.

We lay back on the sofa, the rug was still warm from our body heat. I lay on David's shoulder. The sun was up when I heard the front door open, the only other people with keys were Julie and Jack. Jack stood there stunned in the living room doorway. I sat up, I couldn't cover myself, my hands were still secured behind my back, at least our son couldn't see them like that and the rug didn't fall down. David held it in place. "Jack." David said quietly. "Keep this to yourself."

"Too bloody right I will Dad. I'll just pop and see nanny and grandad, back in an hour." He smiled. "Or do you need longer?" With that he was gone.

Jack got back just past 10, then went out to meet up with his mates. He told us he would be back for tea. I did corned beef stovies. Jack's favourite when he had BBQ sauce on it. He told us about his training, his new RAF friends, a girl he was interested in and had 2 dates so far. He mentioned that he told Nan and Grandad he found us indisposed but did not expand. He told us his Nan just smiled and said 'Good', Grandad looked confused.

Jack asked the question that had probably been burning in his mind. "Look, are you two back together?"

"It's complicated, Your Dad is still going to divorce me, but I think we can work something out, what you saw was part of it. Sorry you saw that."

"So am I, you don't think of your parents, well, doing it, obviously you do otherwise Julie and I wouldn't be here." He laughed. "Next time I'll call, or you could use a bedroom."

Jack stood up to get more tea, I leaned across to David and whispered. "Or the conservatory." David blushed. Hopefully Jack didn't notice his fathers red face when he got back to the table.

David came home about two weeks after the Chinook report writing had finished and told me they had another project, this time for the Royal Navy's Merlin heavy lift helicopter, He could read across an awful lot of the design, and he would use what I had told him for the interference side. Because of the Chinook project they had experience and could easily make racking for the equipment and most of the medical equipment was the same. The job took a little over a month. David had to drive to the Royal Navy base down in the Southwest and he was gone for nearly a week. Mary had dinner waiting for him, but Jasmine welcomed him home.

We settled into a routine. I slept in our bed on the weekend; a few times I was Jasmine but mostly I was Mary. I slept in Julie's for the weekdays. Things were heading the right way, I was in his bed, and I could see the door open slightly to his heart, but it would need more work, a building of trust before I could open it fully and walk through. Trust will come with time and that might take years, that was okay, I was in this for the long run.

It was comfortable and I was happy for that to continue for now. I had a plan, there were still a few weeks to go before the divorce was final and that was when I wanted to make the big change

When I got home, I recognised Tony's car in the street, he had been a regular visitor recently. As I walked in, I heard Dave say. "Good job on finding him." The pair hesitated as I went into the room and they talked about golf, it felt like a forced change of direction. I was talking with Tony if not his wife Sophie.

Tony and Sophie had made up. Sophie wanted to carry on the open marriage, Tony didn't. Sophie threatened him with a divorce, but after what she'd told me, I knew it was an empty threat, I told Tony all that she said to me and he called her bluff and presented her with a divorce petition. She backed down instantly. David and I gave Tony some hints on what he could do to keep their sex life interesting without other people. Tony told us if Sophie hadn't backed down, he would have gone ahead with the divorce, he'd had enough.

Later that evening David told me he was going to Shrewsbury this coming weekend to play Rugby with Tony. Tony doesn't play rugby, but he is a member of the club. They had never gone away for rugby before.

David was too tired to play with either Mary or Jasmine when he got back late Sunday, saying he had been busy and he and Tony had drunk too much celebrating, I thought that strange, they didn't win the match.

The following Monday I got a call from Mr Wetherby senior. It appears Claude had been attacked where he lived in North Wales. I knew Dave went to Shrewsbury with the rugby team and Tony went with him. That is close to North Wales.

I asked Dave when I got in if he knew anything about it. All he said was. "Tony and I have alibis; we were with mates at the rugby all weekend." With that he walked away. It crossed my mind that that lot would stick up for each other.

Things had settled down. We were very comfortable with each other. I would spend the weekend in his bedroom, sometimes David would initiate intimacy. I felt that was a good step. We had talked about our risk addiction. I gently suggested we do outdoors as Derek and Jasmine. He declined, well it was winter. I am sure we can find something to tick our risk boxes.

It was just over a week before the divorce was going to be final when my Mum phoned me. David was on his way home and not due for 20 minutes, so I had a few minutes to chat. Mum asked. "Hello sweetie, how are things going with your plan?" I heard her say.

"Okay I think, things are on track."

"So your plan is working?"

I gave a little giggle. "Oh, you mean the conniving bitch plan to get back into David's heart plan?"

There was a little giggle from the phone. "Yes, that one."

"I'm getting there, sometimes it's been a bit of a struggle. I think I'm repairing the damage I caused, but I need more time."

"Do you think he'll stop the divorce?"

"No Mum, and I think neither should he, I made a mistake. He warned me, he promised me he would divorce me if I did that. I would not make him break his word. And I think it could be a fresh start for us. I have a plan. To make like a Phoenix rising from the ashes."

"Well I hope your plan works, whatever it is? Just let us know how you get on," another little giggle. "Well not the intimate details of course." We said our goodbyes. I turned and there was David. There was a look of thunder on his face.

"What do you mean by 'the conniving bitch plan to get back into David's heart plan'." He had obviously heard everything I talked about between me and my Mum and with all the giggling it sounded light-hearted and frivolous. And it wasn't, it was a very serious undertaking. But I know how it would have sounded to him.

David looked at me through a furrowed brow. "How much of this is a set up to get you back into my life?" I recognised his tone of voice. It was not nice.

"Please sit down, I can explain." I reached out to him. He let me pull him through to the sitting room, I eased him onto the sofa and I sank to my knees in front of him and took his hands. I had practised this because at some stage I expected him to work out what I was doing and I would have to explain my actions,

"My love this is going to sound practiced because it is and if I get this wrong you will leave me, and you have every right to do so." I pulled myself up onto my knees, looked him in the face and said. "I love you, I always have, but I made a big mistake, a huge mistake. I hurt the man I love the most in this world, I lost his trust, I disrespected him, I ignored him, I did not believe him or trust his word and worst of all I hurt him to his soul.

"I needed to heal the pain I had caused. I need to be the nurse that repaired the damage I had done. And the only way I could think of doing it was to stay with him and help him recover in all the ways I know how. And that's not just sex, it's living together, it's sharing, it's families. So yes, this is a setup, but my intentions were always honourable, if not some of the methods I used to heal you and get back into your heart. I've never lied to you, I have never told you untruths, I may have been sometimes a little frugal with the truth and that is on me, my aim was to repair the pain in your heart. And up until this minute I think I have gone a long way to achieving that?" I paused a little. "I wanted to make you into a whole man again."

What I planned to say next was a risk, and not the sort of risk I like. "Since you let me move back in here have I given you any reason to doubt me or that I have lied to you and not done everything I can to help you in any way possible? Okay I might have bent the rules a little on the agreement we made when I moved back in. But you have never complained. Please just think about it?"

He leaned back onto the sofa pulling his hands away from mine. "You're correct, I do need to think about this."

Just then the timer sounded. I had put pizzas on for dinner, he followed me through to the kitchen and sat down. I sliced the pizzas and placed them on a plate in front of him, he stood up and went and got a good bottle of wine and two glasses and from the fridge he got a bottle of BBQ sauce. He knew that would annoy me. The tang in the BBQ sauce would not allow any of the flavours of the wine to come through, why use good wine? There was plenty of cheap red on the wine rack. I'm sure he was doing it just to wind me up. He poured us both a glass.

We did not talk, when he finished his pizza he stood up and said. "I need to think, I'm going to the club." He walked out.

I finished my dinner, cleared the plates and took the wine into the lounge and turned the telly on. I wasn't watching it. I wanted some distraction, I needed to think, and it wasn't coming easy. David was gone about 2 hours or so. Okay it was one hours forty-seven minutes exactly.

He wasn't even tiddly when he walked back in, in fact he looked incredibly sober after nearly 2 hours in the club with his mates.

He sat on the sofa and immediately changed the telly channel without asking, most unlike him.

I made a small reply. "I was watching that."

David looked at me. "Well, your telly works now, you can always watch it in your room."

My mouth hung open. He carried on. "The circuit board connector was loose, I thought you might have checked that after the fuse with your background. Oh, and the back cover screws were loose, I've told you about loose screws in the past." He was smiling.

My face went red. How much did he know?

"How, how much do you know?" I stammered.

Still smiling, he said. "Don't know your detailed plans, just what you are aiming at."

"How long?"

"Oh, about a week after the first conservatory incident and your telly broke." He paused. "Your Mum let something slip."

"What! She said she wouldn't tell anyone." I thought a bit. I glared at him. "You've known for bloody months."

"Your Mum didn't let on, just said that you will do almost anything to make it up to me and get back into my heart. I saw how you used Jasmine and I noticed the little things. You did things I needed and that helped me. I really did appreciate all that you did for me. I kinda put 2 and 2 together. Did I make 4?"

I just nodded. "You let me make a fool of myself?" Then I had a thought. "Why did you go to the club?"

"Just to let you think, to stew, give you time to ponder. Did you?"

"Yes you bastard! I was worried how much you knew and if I'd screwed up my plans?"

He said. "Not really, I was getting sex with Jasmine, and I never pushed for that. I was comfortable being with you, you helped me. So why not. Best of all worlds. And you showed your trust in me, I tied you up and put my hand over your mouth and squeezed your nose. I could have killed you for what you did to me, but you trusted me, and I had to return some of that trust."

I looked at him and said quietly. "Summer said I had to show you that I trusted you as a step to getting you to trust me, just a small step."

"Weren't you worried at all."

"No, because I don't believe you would really harm me."

Then he worried me. He stopped smiling. "You didn't have to get back into my heart, you never left it. But the trust is gone and forgiveness will take a long time coming for the pain you caused me."

I expected nothing less. "You let me do all those things for you? And just now you let me bare my soul? Telling you everything."

"Come on you enjoyed it, the planning, the working out what to do, being Jasmine, Oh and the risk. Anyway, confession is good for you." He continued quietly. "Despite all your efforts the divorce is still going through and whatever happens I will never marry you again. It's the trust thing."

Then he smiled, tilted his head to one side and said with a smile. "The divorce is in 2 weeks, what are your plans now you know I won't stop it? Have I got to book a day off work to celebrate or a removal van for you?"

The smug bastard, all that effort and he knew pretty much all along. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. The bastard!

I leapt at him and pushed him back on the sofa and straddled him and started hitting his chest with my small fists, swearing at him. Falling tears stained his shirt.

He reached up and dragged me down wrapping his arms around me and whispered into my ear. "I love you." Words I had been longing to hear, he carried on. "I wanted to see how far you would go to get back with me."

"Almost anything short of murder and my bum, and that was negotiable," I laughed through the tears.

He pushed me back off of him, stood up and held his hand out, still smiling. I took it.

That night David and Mary made love.

The following morning David asked me. "Removal van?"

"No, save Saturday evening free."

"There will be rules." Then he went and washed both cars.

My paperwork arrived Tuesday, his Thursday. We were both single. I had already booked a discreet table in a booth in Mario's.

Saturday evening I dressed in Julie's room. Blatantly sexy, 4" heeled thong sandals. You could see the red toenail polish through my stockings.

The Burgundy dress I had bought for him over 6 months ago, stocking tops flashing through the split side when I walked. Make-up and hair just how I knew he liked it.

I knew he was waiting for me downstairs, I was fashionably a few minutes late. I tried to make an entrance walking slowly down the stairs making sure he could see the split in the dress. He looked stunning. That may even be a new suit. I was hoping for good things.

The taxi arrived, David held our front door open for me as we walked to the taxi, then the taxi door, ever the gentleman. That was the first time in months he had done that, but this was the first time in 6 months we had been out of the house as a couple.

David helped me from the taxi, the maître de held the restaurant door open and then showed us to our booth.

We had finished the main course and had just started the second bottle of wine,

"David, my darling. I'm sure you have something to say?"

"Yes, I want you back fully in my life, that includes my bed, but I have some propositions to make to you. I will tell you what they are, if you disagree, I will help you move out." He pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and lay it on the table, the writing facing me so I could read it.

"Forsaking all others, if you even dance with another man from this point forward, you leave."

That would cause me a problem. I hadn't told David but in three weeks' time there was a company gala and I would be expected to at least talk and possibly engage with other workers and management. That may mean dancing. I looked at it from David's perspective. I had cheated with somebody in my former company's management chain, and that was still raw with him.

I raised my hand, he nodded, I explained about the Gala and the possible conflict. "Can we compromise? I will not dance with anyone unless you are in the room and I have your permission. I can understand why you have included that condition."

He pondered. "Yes, that's reasonable."

The financial side he laid down is that I will pay half the mortgage, but it was as rent, and I had no call on the house. There was a household fund for food and house stuff. I would still pay half the utility's plus a little bit extra which went into a fund he called the holiday house repair fund. When the mortgage was paid the mortgage money will go into that fund. I asked him if the holiday fund was for both of us? He just smiled and nodded and said. "Together." That gladdened my heart. He was planning on holidays together.

He was in this for the long term too, as long as I didn't screw up. He was still paying me for the house, money was still moving in a circle. The rest of the list was the division of labour. It basically returned to how we did things before I messed everything up, but we paid our own way. He was making a quick separation easy. Again, I could understand why. There was no point in telling him he didn't need to, time will tell him.

The bottom line was I moved all my clothes back into our bedroom and I slept there from this point forward. A waiter walked up and asked if we'd like dessert now. I asked to borrow their pen. He gave me a pen and walked off to get the dessert menus. I didn't need to, but I signed the bottom of the piece of paper and I circled the 'our' in his last sentence. After we ordered the dessert, David looked at the waiter and said. "We will have a bottle of champagne please."

The waiter smiled. "Are we celebrating Sir?"

"Yes we are, our divorce."

We ordered strawberries and cream and I slid round to his side of the booth and we enjoyed them together. When the last sip of champagne was gone, I took hold of his hand and said. "Miss Burrows would like to invite Mr. Mitchell home tonight." He smiled.

I felt I was being tested later. I'd been with the company about nine months and had been offered a promotion. My boss, the head of production and assembly, was retiring and I was offered his position. I had, with David's help, sorted out the reliability issue. Production runs weren't my thing, nor David's, but he had a different outlook on things. I took him for a walk around the factory one day and he pointed out to me that some of the printed circuit boards were not coming off the printing machine cleanly. I picked up some of these and found out they were unserviceable. The people on the shop floor assembling the boards were busy and didn't have time to investigate, because of the number of failures their job was just to produce PCBs. It took a small adjustment, and the reject numbers went down to acceptable level. That helped me with the promotion.

The company held a Guy Fawkes party instead of a Christmas party. Hiring hotels was cheaper then and it was due to be announced at that party that I had the job. David planned to accompany me, he had after all helped and I made no secret to management that David had helped me find the problem. Unfortunately, he got called away to fix a broken ambulance, he was the only one available. Anyway, he enjoys getting his hands dirty. Saturday night in any town is not the place to be short of ambulances. He told me he'd be there as soon as he could.

I was talking to Judy, she was replacing me as production manager. We have become very friendly since I joined the company. There were some other workmates there as well, then one of the senior managers asked me to dance, I declined. My workmates chided me, according to the gossip I was a bit of a star when I sorted out the reliability problem. And I should take advantage of management's interest in me. David had not objected to me dancing with management at the first gala we attended. When I was asked, he would give me a discreet nod or shake of the head. Judy suggested it was harmless, but I told them that David always had the first dance. They thought that was quaint. As we were chatting one the girls looked over my shoulder then back at me and said. "Incoming."

I was hoping it was David, I turned and it was the area manager. He was slightly younger than me, just over 6 foot broad shouldered and had that Adonis look. He seemed like a nice chap when I'd met him before. He was definitely good looking and he had an easy, confident attitude. He gave a slight nod to the people standing around me. He didn't ask, he just put his hand out. I thought that was a bit arrogant. David would never know, he was not here, I could get away with it. But I wasn't tempted. "I'm sorry." I said to him. "I only dance with my boyfriend. When he arrives you could ask him, but until then I'm afraid I must decline your offer."

"I'm sure he wouldn't mind, it's just a quick turn around the floor. There is a nice slow one coming on next. It would be nice."

"I'm sorry." I said again. "You must be hard of hearing. I said no." He nodded his head and walked away.

That was when Judy said to me. "Boyfriend, I thought you two were married or at least engaged, you act like a married couple?"

I thought I would add a bit of mystery to the evening. "Oh, we were married, now we're just boy and girlfriend." It was my turn for the drinks, and I wandered across to the bar. That was when I saw David standing on the corner with a beer glass in his hand, it was half empty, how long had he been standing there watching? I went across to him and gave him a kiss. I told him I was fetching drinks for Judy and my workmates and could he give me a hand. As we were walking to the bar I asked. "How long were you watching?"

"Oh, long enough, that last chap who spoke to you was quite good looking."

"Ah yes, but he's not you and I don't intend to break another vow to you."

"Were you tempted?"

"What a tall, debonair, smart, handsome man like that. No, not really." And I wasn't. I touched his arm. "To jeopardise a lifetime with you for a few minutes' entertainment is not my idea of risk. Now come on, I think Judy's got a lot of questions to ask you. I told her you used to be my husband but now you're my boyfriend."

He laughed. "OK let's go and see what we can stir up and have a bit of fun."

David and I had a bit of a giggle. We left Judy and my workmates completely confused. But I felt I had passed a test in both refusing to dance and, in all honesty, to say that I was not tempted. David made me take my knickers off for the taxi ride home had he put them in his top pocket of his suit just poking out slightly. He made me spread my legs and he played with me. The taxi driver couldn't see anything but I'm sure he heard my sudden intakes of breath. We slept in late the following day.

It was a year later than we initially planned, but I could be seen from the High Street wearing a corset, thigh boots being fucked senseless, what people couldn't see was my hands tied behind my back, the ball gag hidden by the masquerade mask. Once we had been seen, we had 2 floors to navigate to our room, 2 floors was more risky than just one.

Our life returned to a new normal, we planned risky adventure sexy events. I even bought a new wig, a Jessica rabbit wig. We had to be careful with the ball gag, but it looked brilliant.

Epilogue

David

We had been living together now for nearly three years, everybody accepted the situation then it all nearly turned to rat shit. Mary had organised a party for my birthday in the rugby club. That was okay, it would just be family and friends. Things were going well. We were walking around chatting to people. But I felt slightly uneasy, there were too many smiles. It was the 29th of February, traditionally the time when a woman can ask a man to marry her. I had an inkling of what was coming, and she wouldn't like my response if she did that.

Then it happened at just about half 10 she dragged me to the middle of the dance floor. She got down on one knee, her father passed her a small box. Looking up at me she said. "I love you, I know I screwed up, we have been good together these last three years. I would like to reset our marriage back before I was so stupid. Would you..."

I was correct in my assumption when I'd guessed this was going to happen, I tried to make it as painless as I could. I knelt down in front of her, she stopped talking, everybody was surprised.

"Please don't do this, I love you." I said back to her, loud enough for everyone to hear. "I said I would always love you, and I will." I lowered my voice so only those close could hear. "If you had asked me the question you are about to ask with just our parents and the kids, I might have said yes. but not with all the family and friends here. I feel like I am being shamed into this, I feel you are making a spectacle of something personal. You may not see it that way, but I do. I know you're trying your best to make it up to me and trying to show others your love for me."

With that I stood up and walked towards the exit. I got outside and pulled my phone out. There was no way I could drive. There was complete and utter silence from the club house. They were probably still stunned. I'm sure everybody was certain I would say 'yes'. We looked like a married couple, we acted like a married couple, why would anybody think that I would say 'no'? But they had not been in pain.

All of a sudden a Burgundy whirling dervish hurtled out of the club house and threw herself at me.

"Please no, don't throw me out. I love you, I wanted to show everyone my love for you, I thought that was the best way to do it. I want to spend my life with you; I want to be with you for our grandchildren."

With some difficulty I eased her arms from around my neck, grasping hold their shoulders I said to her. "I said 'no' to marriage, I didn't say we couldn't carry on as we are. The choice is yours. I love you, but I will never marry you. I like things the way they are, accept that or move on." A car horn sounded. "My taxi is here, I need to go."

She took hold of my hand, lifted up and kissed the back tilting her head gently to one side and said. "You have forgiven, but you have not forgotten?"

I just smiled. She got down on her knees again. She took my hand, looked up at me and said. "I'm sorry I made a mistake, another one. You say you love me, please come back inside I will say something to show that you are not a bad person and then we'll go home."

I dismissed the taxi, we can get another one in a bit.

Mary took my hand and led me into the club. The noise coming from inside was subdued. We got to the door. She was breathing deeply, we must have stood there for nearly a minute. I recognised the furrowed brow.

She looked up at me, smiled and said. "Please"

Pulling me by the hand we went in. I heard her say. "Please turn the music off." There was silence. I saw her take a deep breath. She pulled herself up to her full height. "My family and friends, I'm sorry you had to witness that. Most of you know what I planned tonight. Thank you for your support. However, I, that is me, got this wrong. My sweetheart standing here beside me, the love of my life has forgiven what I did to him, but he has not forgotten. I was foolish to think that he would, I was foolish to invite you all to this, to what he sees as a trap. How could he say 'no' to a marriage proposal on the 29th of February in front of all our family and friends. Well guess what, he is so strong he did. I firmly believe he has forgiven me for what I did, but he will never forget the pain I caused and therefore he will never marry me." She looked up at me, tears pouring from her eyes "Please, I love you, I made another silly mistake. I do not want to lose you. This is my fault, do we still have a home together?"

I smiled at her. "It has taken a while but I can see you're starting to see things more from my point of view. Let's say goodbye to everyone then we will go home and let the celebrations carry on."

Many years later.

Laying in my hospital bed David was helped into the room by Julie and Jack, the man I had loved since I first met him over 60 years ago. The grandchildren followed them in, my time was close, they had all come to say goodbye, a tear trickled from my eye. We were both passed 85, his eyes twinkled, his body may be as frail as mine, but his mind was as sharp as always.

He got beside my bed and he knelt down. I felt my brow furrow. Julie said. "Don't worry Mum." she smiled and with that Jack handed David a small box, his hands not shaking. He opened it and I saw two rings. He picked up one, took my hand and placed it on my ring finger, he placed the other ring on his finger.

He looked at me and said "I love you, I will see you shortly Mrs Mitchell." He hadn't called me that in years. "In the eyes of our family we are now man and wife." I looked up and there were a few tears in a few eyes. Jack helped him sit in the chair next to my bed. David's hand slid across and took mine, he gave it a reassuring squeeze.

I looked at him and smiled. "I love you." He smiled back. He turned his head and looked at the family, so did I. His hand in mine went limp. Julie noticed, she rushed forward, took his other hand. "Dad, dad." Jack had the call button and was stabbing it repeatedly. I looked at her, tears were pouring out of her eyes.

"Don't worry, ever the gentleman, he has gone ahead to open the door for me." I felt a glow of warmth engulf me as I closed my eyes.